Flow With Freedom

Flow with Freedom If you practice a yoga style based on Sun Salutations, such as Vinyasa or Hatha Flow, you know how tricky it can be to go from Downward-Facing Dog Pose to a high lunge in one fell swoop. You may find the foot you're trying to bring forward falls a few inches short of the desired position safely in alignment under the knee and between the hands. Many students need to inch the front foot forward or even use their hands to pick up the ankle and physically place it where it should go. Luckily, observing a few simple tricks of the trade can help. Try incorporating the following into your practice every day to get yourself flowing more smoothly: 1. Slow it down. The next time you try this maneuver, do it as slowly and deliberately as possible. When it starts to get difficult, make sure you're engaging your core by pulling your belly in and pushing the floor away with your hands. 2. Pay attention. One of the best ways to transform your body is by noticing when you fall into your old patterns, and making a conscious effort to break the habits. In this case, notice when you tend to stop engaging your core (you'll know you're not engaging if your foot makes a loud noise when it hits the floor). Then, try the action again with awareness. 3. Work your core. Practice moving slowly from Downward Dog to Plank and back again, remembering to engage your core by pulling the belly toward your spine and pushing the floor away with your hands. Then, from Down Dog, lift one foot behind you and keep it up as you rock forward into Plank Pose, bringing your knee into your body and toward your nose. YogaJournal

Seven Toxic Thinking Patterns To Break (2)

There are at least seven toxic thinking patterns that can put a hold on our brain, and imprison it with pseudo feel-goods, and other lies.

As noted in Part 1, functionally, these topsy-turvy beliefs are protective strategies, designed to activate our defenses when something triggers us. Because this lowers anxiety in varying degrees, it also stimulates the reward centers of the brain — and explains why, at least subconsciously, we associate them with pseudo feel-good feelings.

Our conscious mind likely disagrees, of course. How can thoughts make us “feel good” when they make us feel so bad? Doesn’t make sense, right? It makes sense to our brain and body, however. And, that’s the purpose of this discussion.

To break the hold of toxic thinking patterns, we need to become aware of them, and yes, to understand how tricky they are.

Their power to trick our brain exists largely when they operate beneath the radar of our conscious mind. It how these fear and pleasure-inducing thinking patterns, for the most part, “trained” our brain to automatically react in unhealthy ways.

It is also why conscious awareness is foundational to healing and change processes. Our thoughts, accordingly, shape our behaviors, and the direction of our lives. Healthy thinking patterns are — a choice — and that means they must be cultivated and learned.

It’s a question of who we want to put in charge of our life? The born-to-be-a-wise-thinker part of us (conscious, cultivated) — or our body’s nonthinking sensory system?

How do pseudo “feel-goods” trick the brain?

The subconscious mind is in charge of all autonomic processes of the body. Also known as the mind of the body, the subconscious is its operating system. Unless we consciously choose otherwise, the mind of our body naturally gravitates toward what makes us feel good or comfortable, and simultaneously, what avoids making us feel bad or uncomfortable.

The brain and body make no distinction between feels-good that are physical, mental or emotional. In practical terms, this means we are inwardly motivated to do more than just survive, to thrive.

We are much more than servants of biological survival  — and some of the latest findings in neuroscience seem to support what sages have proclaimed from the beginning of recorded history.

• We are hardwired with inborn drives that propel us to want to “feel good” about our self and life – in a meaningful sense.
• We are wired with circuitry for caring, empathy and connection. Our brain “is a relationship organ,” as Dr. Daniel Siegel puts it; we are relationship beings.
• We share impulses – inborn motivation that shapes our wants, thoughts, desires, aspirations, passion, behaviors, thoughts – driving us to find a myriad of ways (actions, ranging from effective and fulfilling to ineffective quick-fixes and non-fulling) to love and be loved, to connect meaningfully, and, among others, to contribute value in life.

Essentially, we are meaning-making beings driven by heart energies to seek and find purpose in life.

In our heart of hearts, our highest impulse is to “self-actualize,” a term psychologist Abraham Maslow coined, and described as a universal drive to reach a state of being in which we experience a spiritual oneness with self, others, and life, a seeking to find purpose by meaningfully contributing to life in some way.

Toxic thinking tricks our brains to rely on easy and quick-fix pseudo “feel-good” feelings, that:

• Make us feel “needed,” “important,” “caring,” etc., by worrying, working hard to please or fix others, or blasting them with our anger.
• Help us “feel-good” by feeling “better than,” “superior” or “self-righteous,” i.e., by focusing our attention on how “right” or “good” we are versus how “wrong” or “bad” others are, etc.
• Relieve us of pressure or responsibility to change or grow (which is a feel-good!) by giving us “reasons” (excuses) to avoid doing the inner work this (always) involves.
• Provide comfort and safety in staying with the familiar, i.e., not stretching out of comfortable zones, such as old childhood neural patterns (early survival-love maps).
• Give us a pseudo sense of “feeling close” with someone, i.e., when we complain/gossip about how another has hurt or wronged us, doesn’t appreciate us, etc.
• Elude us into “feeling” that we are “solving” our issues when in fact all we’re doing is wasting (valuable) energy complaining, whining, blaming others, etc.
• Keep us in feelings of anger, resentment, or bitterness, which “help” us avoid feeling our feelings of vulnerability, such as rejection, abandonment, loneliness, powerlessness, etc.

Like other addictive substances or activities, toxic “feel good” thinking patterns can be described as futile attempts to help us get control over our life that lead us to increasingly lose control instead.

Also like addictive substances, they provide cheap thrill ways of instantly feeling “okay” or “important” or “valued.”

Like junk food, drugs or alcohol, additionally, these thinking/behaving patterns are defensive strategies that “help” us obtain quick-fix releases of “feel good” hormones. They stimulate certain reward centers of the brain. Albeit only brief and temporary fixes, nevertheless, they instantly lower anxiety, thus, producing pseudo “feel goods” in the body.

This misleads our subconscious mind into thinking that these protective strategies “work” well. It also “thinks” it’s doing a great job whenever it reminds us to use one or more of these “quick-fixes” when, in reality, it’s acting more like an alarm system that gets jammed in “on” position in certain situations (that trigger us).

The subconscious mind is stuck, and guess who holds the key to its (and our) freedom? We do. We can make self-directed changes not only to the thoughts on our mind, but also to the neural structure of our brain.

Examples of toxic thinking patterns?

What are some examples of toxic thinking patterns? Here seven toxic thinking patterns that trick our brain and body into relying on them as “trusted friends”:

1. Fault-finding or complaining

EXAMPLE: “Well, you did it again” OR, “I think it’s awful that you always …”

2. Blaming

EXAMPLE: “If only he/she hadn’t or wouldn’t … everything would be fine.”

3. Triangulating, gossiping

EXAMPLE: “Well, he/she did it again” OR, “I think it’s awful that he/she always …”

4. Communication blocking

EXAMPLE: “Don’t tell him/her; it will only upset him.”

Or “Don’t let her have the last word; she won’t respect you.”

5. Rescuing others

EXAMPLE: “This is too much for him/her” OR, “I must fix him/her so they don’t get upset, angry, etc.

6. Portraying self as a victim, helpless, or needing to be rescued

EXAMPLE: “I wouldn’t be in this mess if weren’t for my mother/father.”

7. Making excuses

EXAMPLE: “I’ve tried everything; nothing works.”

What makes these thinking patterns toxic to us? They:

• (Pointlessly…) Activate the body’s fight or flee response with thoughts that trigger our core fears, such as fear of rejection, inadequacy, etc.
• (Needlessly…) Keep our brain out of “learning mode” (reflective, possibility thinking) and instead in “protective mode” (or alert status), perhaps for extended periods of time.
• (Unfairly…) Prevent us from growing our capacity to regulate our fears (to calm our mind and body so we may remain empathically connected whenever we feel vulnerable).

It’s not a pretty picture, is it?

Though well-intentioned, these toxic thinking patterns cause feeling states and behaviors that can never nourish us or satisfy our drives for emotional fulfillment. At best, they are mere futile attempts that, instead, leave us with insatiable cravings for more quick-fix feel-goods.

At worst, they “protect” us from what we need most: to feel our feelings, face our fears. Our inner world of sensations is a source of vital and life enriching information that is designed to inform our choices and potentially help us make wiser decisions.

For example, just because someone feels upset or angry, or does not give us what we want, it doesn’t necessarily mean we’re not loved or appreciated. When we defensively resort to quick-fix options in dealing with these ongoing issues in our life and relationships, however, such as giving them the “silent treatment” to “teach” them to appreciate us, will this solve or more likely exacerbate the problem?

We know this doesn’t work deep inside. Defensive behaviors – our own or others’ – most always produce more of the feelings and behaviors that left us feeling lonely, unappreciated or emotionally detached to begin with.

It is pointless, needless and unfair, and can be baffling, but doesn’t need to be.

Toxic-feel-good thinking patterns are held in place by beliefs that, in effect, cause us to feel fearful in situations that are actually not a “real” threat to us. These beliefs, in turn, produce reactive behaviors, ranging from emotional manipulation to aggressive bullying, all of which are pseudo ways of restoring balance to the energies of our body. These are only a few of many good reasons to replace them with healthful, life energizing thinking patterns!

The “real” threat to our health and future?

Toxic-feel-good thinking patterns are excuses or lies we have learned to tell ourselves that are rigidly held in place by fear-based beliefs. They are toxic as they block change and healing processes essential to living healthful, fulfilled lives.

In effect, toxic thinking is the real threat to the health of our body, mind and relationships – and not what stresses us or triggers our fears and painful emotions.

It is toxic thinking that blocks us from what we, as human beings, most need and yearn for in life: To feel alive in meaningful connection to our self and life around us; to feel our love is “good enough” and contributes value in our life and relationships; and to love courageously, thus, authentically with our whole hearts, with no “need” for approval or things external to ourselves to feel “complete” or deserving of love.

How many of the above patterns do you use?

They are not easy to break. It will require consistent effort, and determination, as they are self-reinforcing. They can be stubborn, as they are rooted in fear.

Your mind is a treasure, however. It is in your highest interest to change and replace them, and it is achievable as it is worthwhile.

Your imagination is working memory for the creation of yourself and life. The words you use, and the thoughts you think, activate dynamic processes in your body. In many ways, you are … whomever you think or say you are.

What is more, you deserve to give yourself the gift of a life free of toxic thinking patterns.

It is a matter of how willing you are, how much you want to break their hold, and … what you believe is possible for you.

Athena Staik, PH.D

Seven Toxic Thinking Patterns To Break (1)

Habitual thinking patterns that cause intense feelings of fear, anger, shame or guilt are not only toxic, but also addictive in nature.

Why? They stimulate pleasure and learning centers of the brain similar to addictive substances.

Toxic thinking is characteristically compulsive in nature and causes intense fear-based feelings, which can overwhelm or zap our body’s energy supply. It consists of thoughts that habitually forecast disaster, perpetuate worry, instill doubt, obsess on perfection, describe self (or another) as a victim, or point fingers at others.

So, how can these pain feelings stimulate pleasure?

Though toxic thoughts paint images of self and others with colors of lack, gloom or failure, subconsciously, they are protective strategies that get activated automatically in our defense when something triggers us. Thus, our body associates them with pseudo “feel good” feelings that lower our anxiety, albeit in ineffective, quick-fix ways.

In recent decades, neuroscience research has increased our understanding of the processes that lead to the formation of healthy and unhealthy habits, to include addictions.

Pleasure – and fear – as stimulants and “teachers”?

We now have a better understanding of how intoxicating highs stimulate the “reward” centers of the brain, and the role mixed emotions of — pleasure and fear — play in stimulating these centers to establish an addiction, addictive relating patterns, or emotional reactivity in general.

• The high is produced by neurochemicals that induce pleasure, dopamine in particular.

Dopamine is a neurotransmitter, a chemical messenger of the brain that plays a major role in forming addictions, and habits in general, healthy or otherwise. It transmits “teaching” signals to the reward centers of the brain responsible for acquiring new habits.

• The other, less known, catalyst that stimulates the reward centers for the release of hormones is: fear.

Whether related to risk taking, taboo or past trauma, fear is a chief chemical-stimulant that works together with pleasure to enhance and intensify the highs in the brain’s reward centers. In fact, the brain is in its most alert state of receptivity to learning in the presence of danger.

This makes sense, considering that survival is the primary directive of the part of the mind, the subconscious, that runs the body and is in charge of all the processes involved in forming or breaking habits.

• Thus, fear not only reinforces learning, it also increases the chances that a particular memory will receive preferential attention from the subconscious mind.

This means the subconscious mind will record the “experience” in a special place in memory, an “intelligence report” of sorts, which the subconscious mind turns to whenever we get triggered or feel threatened in some way.

(The use of “fear” to condition behaviors also explains why commercial and political advertisements use fear to condition us to behave in certain ways.)

Toxic thinking patterns act as “drugs of choice”?

Certain thinking patterns, in particular ones that subconsciously activate the body’s fear response, or “fight or flee” system, are powerful.

• How?

They activate powerful inner processes that produce dynamic physiological changes in the body. They prepare us to run away or confront a perceived threat. When fear is the basis for behaviors, it is connected to the part of the brain that is responsible for ensuring survival — the fight or flight stress response.

• They are automatic.

They cause the subconscious mind to automatically perform an instant coup d’état of the body’s normal processes. Unfortunately, this disengages the higher thinking processes of the brain by cutting off much of the oxygen flow.

• They are limiting in varying degrees.

And herein lies the problem. The brain is always in either “protective mode” or “learning mode.” When it’s in “protective mode,” its otherwise amazing capacity to make informed choices, decisions is not fully functioning. It is no longer in “learning mode.”

• They are toxic-thinking patterns.

The subconscious mind has a seemingly limitless capacity for memory and multitasking, processing millions, and some say billions, of bits of information per second. It does no original thinking, however. It relies on our thoughts (and associated beliefs, feelings) to form the “perceptions” it uses to determine whether or not to activate the body’s fear response.

• They are not “real” thoughts.

Our thoughts or “self-talk” are an inner running commentary, a stream of about 60,000 thoughts a day. A good portion of this habituated thinking consists of rigid, black-and-white thoughts — in other words, toxic thinking patterns — such as blame, fault-finding, self-pity, etc. These negatively charged thoughts are not real thinkingat all. They are habituated thoughts that emerge from limiting beliefs, many of which are subconscious and carry over from the formative years of childhood.  Examples of limiting beliefs are:

If I say no, I will be rejected or abandoned.
If someone says no to my request, it means they don’t love or appreciate me.
It’s wrong to put “demands” or need something from others.
It’s not love if you have to ask; he/she should know what I want/need.
Anger means you are not loved, accepted by or adequate enough to another.
Psychological or physical violence is OK when it is “deserved.”

• They are based on beliefs that were imprinted in our memory the formative years of early childhood early survival-love maps.

Where do these thoughts come from? Beliefs.

In this case, certain core beliefs that form our self-concept, for example, what it means to love and be loved, what it means to “matter” or feel value in life, in relation to our self and others. They are thoughts that the subconscious accrues in a special record it keeps of all past “scary” moments. These pockets of memory contain related data, such as feelings, images, beliefs, and so on. I refer to these records in cellular memory as our early survival-love maps.

Many of them spawn unhelpful and limiting views of anger, whereasanger is designed to be a healthy emotion that moves us to action to stand up for our selves and not give up on our dreams – once, that is, we accept and respect its value, and learn how to express it assertively – rather than defensively. Some examples of limiting beliefs that produce toxic thoughts about anger include:

Never be angry.
Never talk about your anger.
Men can be angry, women cannot.
Anger leads to abuse and pain.
Anger means you are not loved.
If you make him/her angry, they will abandon you.

• They offer quick-fix “pseudo” relief that lowers anxiety and restores body’s equilibrium in varying degrees.

The instant relief we get by activating our protective strategies, such as blasting someone with our anger or stewing on how we “always” get the short end of the stick, is what makes toxic-thinking addictive. They are old and “comfortable” ways of protecting ourselves, that is, by lowering our anxiety with instant pseudo “feel good” toxic thoughts.

• The subconscious does no original thinking.

Our subconscious mind is completely dependent on the conscious mind to wisely discern between “feel goods” that are healthful and those that are harmful. By design, it has no capacity to do its own thinking.

Whenever something “works” to lower anxiety and restore our body to natural state, the subconscious mind automatically puts it on the “list of things that work to ensure survival.” Hence, “things” that neuro-chemically produce pseudo “feel-good” feelings in our body.

• The subconscious cannot discern between what is toxic or healthful.

The subconscious mind cannot discern between what “feels good” that is toxic or even destructive, such as junk food or drugs or toxic thoughts, and what “feels bad” yet is healthful, such as learning a new subject or giving a speech or changing a toxic thinking pattern or two.

With repeated stimulation, old reward centers form new neuropathways that demand more of the same, thus, producing more intense cravings. As the body habituates to the highs that repeated stimulation produces, other processes that seek to restore equilibrium then form new neuropathways, which demand greater intensity and frequency to achieve the same stimulation.

An addiction is formed, and along with it, a wide array of emotional, physical and mental health costs.

Genuine versus “pseudo” feel-goods?

This combination of stimulating emotions of pleasure and fear literally conditions our brain to live life at odds with self, a life of contradictory desires and passions that, if not stopped, has power to control and take away what is of lasting and real value to a person’s life.

It’s safe to say that what distinguishes “genuine” feel-goods from “pseudo” feel-goods is that the former, in contrast to the latter, seeks to delight us yet also enhance our health, growth, transformation, or at minimum, cause no harm.

Toxic thinking patterns and pseudo feel-goods block change and healing. Like addiction, toxic “feel good” thinking patterns are an escape, a series of actions that fail in their attempt to help you to get control over your life, and that lead instead to abandoning control to lies, falsehoods and acts of desperation.

At root all addiction is a fear of intimacy, in particular, an intimate knowing of self.

It is a topsy-turvy system of beliefs that imprisons the mind with lies that lead us to avoid, run away from, block, or “protect” ourselves against what we most need and yearn for in life: To feel alive in meaningful connection to self and life around us, to contribute the love we aspire to express, courageously, with our whole heart.

Speaking of thinking patterns, Carl Jung, one of the most brilliant thinkers in the modern era, was first among other theorists and psychologists to point out that the human mind, or psyche, continuously strives toward a feeling state of wholeness, in search of meaning and purpose. In contrast to pseudo feel-goods, genuine “feel goods” work alongside the directives of the body to ensure that you both survive, and thrive in health and wholeness.

The solution is simple, and though not easy, it’s achievable with determination: You are wired for a life time of learning, healing and change


Athena Staik PH.D
Psychcentral.com

Could A Gluten Allergy Be Making You Sick?

It’s a bit of a challenge to avoid gluten in your diet, and it can be a little heartbreaking to have to try. After all, most of our favorite carbohydrates contain it! This special type of protein is found in abundance in wheat, rye, barley, and more… then baked into breads, crackers, and pastas. Gluten can also be hidden in foods you don’t expect, like vanilla extract, candy, broth, or yogurt. For people who suffer from celiac disease or even milder versions of gluten intolerance, eating just a few bites of gluten can disrupt their digestive systems or cause damage to their intestinal linings. Experts currently estimate that 43 percent of the population has some level of gluten intolerance; this means that it’s a very real possibility you could be upsetting your gastrointestinal tract with just a slice of bread or your next bowl of pasta. Here’s what you should consider:

• Watch for symptoms. While food allergies may cause distinct, immediate reactions, the effects of a food intolerance may be more subtle. You may develop fatigue, weight gain, bloating (especially in the face), and digestive issues like gas, heartburn, diarrhea, or constipation.
• Consider testing. Celiac disease is often diagnosed using either a blood test, stool test, or an intestinal biopsy — though it isn’t always caught right away. If you suspect that a gluten intolerance is causing your health issues, consult your doctor or, if you'd like to look into it yourself, order a food-allergy panel or aceliac antibody screen.
• Try out the gluten-free diet. These days, gluten-free versions of your favorite foods are more available than ever, including pastas and breads. Consider taking a break from gluten for a month to see if your weight loss and your overall health improve. (Be aware that you’ll need to watch out for “hidden” gluten, in things like modified food starch, thickening agents, caramel coloring, MSG, flavored coffee, and soy sauce.) You may discover that avoiding gluten is your ticket to feeling great.

There’s nothing fun about making sacrifices, but some of them are totally worth it. How important to you is good health and a Sexy Forever body? My husband found out he was gluten intolerant, and he gave it up. He not only lost 15 pounds, but he also got all his energy back! No more bloating up or falling asleep in the afternoon! My food intolerances are eggs and yeast, and let me tell you, while I really miss those foods, giving up those indulgences is well worth the effort. I am slimmer, and I feel great. So, chin up! You can do it, too.

Suzanne Somers

Top 5 Mind-Body Tips For Healthy Living

1) Meditate to calm your mind and stay young

Meditation helps calm the mind and reduce stress. Regular practice helps us meet many of the routinely challenging situations in our lives with less effort, and we achieve better results.

Few people realize that meditation also slows the aging process. One study associated meditation with higher levels of the ‘anti-aging hormone’, DHEA, implying that meditation slowed aging. A Harvard study showed that it even impacts us at the genetic level, affecting around 2,000 genes, some of which counteracted damage to the body from free radicals, thus potentially slowing the rate of aging.

A simple way to meditate is to sit down and listen to the sound of your breathing for about 10 minutes a day.

2) Believe that your mind can help you to heal

Studies of the placebo effect – where people get better in medical trials while taking dummy drugs – reveal that belief can make us well from many different ailments. When you believe in a medicine, or in the physician prescribing it, it is likely to work better for you. We have a powerful capacity to affect our own health with our minds.

One interesting placebo study saw volunteers in a pain study have placebo cream applied to one of their hands or feet, although they thought it was a local anaesthetic. Then they had extract of chili (capsicum) injected into their hands and feet. Incredibly, the pain selectively reduced where the cream was applied but not on the other hands and feet.

A simple way to build belief like this is to tell yourself regularly that the mind can help heal the body. Read up on scientific evidence of mind over matter (there’s lots around) and this will help you to believe in yourself.

The most common methods people use to visualize healing are where they imagine inside the body at the site(s) of illness and imagine changing it from illness to wellness. They imagine cleaning, clearing, scooping, melting, or even sending love and affection, or any other method they can think of. And they do it regularly.

Of course, using visualization is not a substitute for medical advice. It is something that you would use in addition to medical advice. That’s the intelligent approach.

3) Show compassion and kindness to people

Compassion physically impacts the brain, building up empathy centers and areas that help us to feel more positive and emotionally balanced. It is also linked with the vagus nerve. Some studies show that compassion is associated with the fitness of the vagus nerve in how it reduces inflammation in the body.

This is a good thing because too much inflammation plays a major role in heart disease, some cancers, and possibly the majority of diseases we know of.

Kindness is also good for your health. The bonding hormone, oxytocin, is released through warm emotional contact, which is something that kindness cultivates. Great research on oxytocin shows that it is cardioprotective – it helps protect your arteries from agents of disease. So kindness is cardioprotective. I love that because everyone is familiar with the idea that kindness (and love) is good for the heart (and soul). Science is saying the same thing.

Kindness can also make a real difference in someone’s life. We shouldn’t do kindness because we are trying to gain. We are kind because it’s the right thing to do. But the gains are real; they are side effects, written into our genetic code through the millions of years of caretaking behaviour of our ancestors.

4) Be Positive

OK. We’ve all heard this before, but it is important from a health perspective. A good dose of positivity can help us navigate some of the difficult situations in our lives with less stress. And stress, as we know, plays a role in illness and disease. Less stress can equal longer life.

Some studies on positivity show that it is associated with better health. One 30-year study found that optimists had around a 50% lower risk of early death than pessimists and a few others show that a positive attitude is associated with a longer lifespan.

Of course, there are always exceptions. We all know positive people who die young and very pessimistic people who outlive their entire families. That’s a statistical thing and will always be true. But take a sample of several thousand people and you will see that positivity is associated with longevity.

5) Cultivate a heart of gratitude

Counting our blessings is good for our mental and emotional health. One 3-week study compared those counting blessings with those counting their hassles. It was called a ‘Blessings vs Burdens’ study. The blessings group kept a daily diary of some things that they were grateful about while the burdens group kept a diary of their daily hassles. After the 3 weeks, those in the blessings group were 23% happier than those in the burdens group.

A few simple methods that you might use are, a) Write a daily list of 5-10 things that you are grateful for that have happened in the last day (it’s good to do this just before going to bed), or b) Choose a different person each day and spend a few moments thinking of all the reasons why you are grateful for their presence in your life.

Gratitude is a tasty ingredient in food for the soul.

Dr David R Hamilton PhD